I picked up a series of cds at the library recently by Rudyard Kippling, read by Jim Weiss, "Just So Stories." My own life as a parent is filled with 'Just So Stories', but I put my own twist on them-
Here are some recent
Stories that, well...
Just make me Smile
So:
Liam...
L: Look, Mama! Mmm! A snack!
Me: Looking to the backseat of the car to see what on earth he was eating, since we try not to eat in our van. There was my darling son, contorted expertly with one foot up to his mouth, chomping delicately away at his toenails. "What are you doing, Son??"
L: (With an irresistible grin) Having a snack! And look, Mama! I always have them with me! Mmm-tasty! And my fingernails, too! Yum!
What's a Mama to do?! Wonder if we can patent that idea...The portable snacks that always leave home with you and costs nothing! I suppose you could even add boogers to the 'ingredients list'!
----
I went to a Bible Study last week and when I came home, Bren said, "Did you see L's hair?"
Oh no, I thought. He went and cut all his hair off, I'll bet. I knew he'd do this when I was gone!! (I happen to love longer hair on my little guy.) I peaked into the bedroom and was puzzled- L looked exactly the same; no haircut, nothing strange.
Me: What were you talking about? Did you do something to his hair that I can't see?
B: Nope. I was going to give him a haircut. But he was adamantly against it.
Me: Why?
B: He said that he didn't want me to cut his hair because you wouldn't recognize him, and he wanted to 'be the same Liam so Mama knows me when she comes home."
My boy.
(Over the weekend, though, they did cut his hair while I was home. He's got a new kind of 'do right now. Not sure how long we'll keep it this way, but it's kind of fun.)
When he showed it to me in the other room, he assured me, "I'm still Liam, Mama."
Check it out:
----
My kids have suddenly developed a fascination and love for gum. Lord, help me. I do allow the oldest two to sometimes split a piece of gum, always reminding them to keep it in their mouths and not to swallow it. So far, they'd done a pretty good job at sticking to the rules. A few days ago we went to the park and I'd popped a piece of gum in my mouth, trying to be discreet so I wouldn't have to share with little mouths. We sat down at a park bunch, and my gum was already getting stale. Since there was no trash nearby, I put it on a piece of paper (we were writing/drawing in our Nature Notebooks).
Fastforward a half hour later... the kids were now playing on the playground and I noticed L chomping on something.
Me: Buddy, what's in your mouth?
L: Gum.
Me: Huh? Where'd you get a piece of gum from?
L: Uh... I dunno.
Me: What?! Did you pick it up off the ground?
L: No. I don't remember.
Me: Spit it out right now (into my hand, of course!)
Let's just say I was very thankful to see it was the unnatural bright blue of the gum I had recently been chewing... at least, I hope it was my gum!!
Golly gee, our guardian angels are kept busy, aren't they?!
------
Okay, one more L story:
During Mass this past Sunday, L was having a hard time concentrating. So I tried to quietly talk with him, giving him the 'play by play' of what was happening up on the altar. It happened to be right after Communion, and he wanted to know more about the Tabernacle. I told him that's where Father puts Jesus's Precious Body in the Eucharist.
L: (imagine a burst of exuberance... i.e. a little loud) What?! Jesus is in there?! So, if I go up there and open it up, He will jump out of there and I can see him for real?!?!?!
How I love the candid and eager Faith of children!
----
Maia...
I never imagined the 'birds and bees' talk would be just around the corner with only a six year old child!! Well, hopefully not quite yet, but I'm certainly realizing it will come sooner than I thought!
Out of the blue last week M asked me, "Mama, I was wondering... does God make little girls, like ya know, 6 year olds like me, well... how come 6 year olds can't have babies?"
(Quick thinking, Mama, come on!!)
Me: Well... first of all, your body isn't able to have a baby yet. God makes our bodies change as we get older, and when you get a little older your body will change and be able to have babies, if that's what God wants for you. Also, what else is important to have a baby?
M: You have to get married.
Me: Yep. So... are you ready to get married yet?
M:(giggles) No! But maybe when I get older and Liam gets older I can marry him!
Me: Well... brothers and sister can't get married, Sweetie. But you can pray that you'll meet someone as wonderful as Liam when you're older.
---
Now, fast forward a few days later...
We were in the car, and M was reading a book about animals. She started telling me what she was learning from the book (in particular about how with many animals the male is much prettier than the female so they can 'show off' to the female- like the peacocks and certain kinds of fish), and suddenly she got her wonderful 'ponderous Maia' look. Uh oh.
M: Mama.... if God makes our bodies change when we get older to have babies when we get married, well...how does God make animals' bodies change to have babies? I mean... does that happen when they get married?
Oh boy.
Me: Well... animals don't actually get married. (uttering a prayer for wisdom, knowing where this was going to head!!!)
M: Hmmm. Well, then how do they have babies?
Me: Um... well... animals are different than people. They don't 'get married'. Many of the male animals find a female animal they like and for animals, that's kind of similar to 'getting married'... but they don't actually have to 'get married'. Can you imagine two rabbits getting married in a church before a priest?!
(going for the 'diversion' plan right now!)
M: (imagining this in her mind and laughing about it) Haha! That would be really funny! Can you imagine.... (and the conversation took a nice and neat and silly different turn). Thank God! Not quite ready to explain the bird and the bees, or the rabbits and the fish to her quite yet!!
----
Chiara...
Finally, the little dolly.
She's really starting to talk up a storm these days, and we are slowly becoming more fluent in "Chiara-ish". The girl most certainly knows all the time what she's saying- and believe me, she will say something over and over a hundred times until she knows for sure that we understand exactly what she's saying!! Here's a few instances of my 'getting it wrong':
C: hysterical in the car because she wants her 'I want buck buck buck buck!'
So after 10 minutes of this and no indication of it stopping, I finally pulled the car over and got out, determined to get her several books and be on with the drive. But she was equally determined to make sure I understood it was NOT a book she wanted. After several attempts to pick out the 'buck' she wanted with no success, I left her crying, frustrated with my own inability to interpret her language. When we got home, I unbuckled her and she slipped out of her carseat, reached over to the cup holder on the side, and pulled out a little rubber bug. She held it up to me and said, "buck". Okay. Bug.
C: again, hysterical in the car, telling me "hot, hot, hot, Mama!" (no, unfortunately she wasn't complimenting her mother on her appearance that day!)
Thinking she was hot from the Florida humidity, I turned on the air full blast.
Me: Is that better, sweetie? I turned on the air.
C: (still crying) No!!! Hot, Hot, Hot!
After a frustrated outburst by her Mama, C finally settled down, realizing I was a hopeless cause.
We got home, I unbuckled her, and she once again slipped out of the carseat, leaned down and picked up her hat off the floor, put it on her head and smiled at me, patting her head and saying 'hot, hot.' Okay. Hat.
Dada = Maia
Ef= Apple
Buy= Liam
Baby = Caedmon
Pohpoh= Poopoo
Cone= a scone from Panera (!!)
Rays= raisin
And, my personal favorite, "Hud" or "Hode" (hug, hold).
We're getting there.... slowly. But you know what will happen- we'll finally 'master' this ingenious new language, and she'll move on to something less interesting and more predictable- like English. Oh well! Parenting certainly keeps your mind a-wheeling, your pride a-stomped on, and your heart a-melting.
